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Archive for May, 2003
The OneAm I the only one who liked the original Matrix better than the second one? Billy MaysHe is loud and he is annoying. He is Billy Mays, of Orange Glo and Oxi Clean fame. I was working in my office, minding my own business, CNN news softly in the background. And then I felt it. A sharp needle in my eye, a stick through my ears, a wack on the back of my head. It was Billy Mays selling something. I’m glad I’m not the only one who would like to see Billy Mays banned from television.
The secret is no moreOne of the readers of this website called me on the phone this morning and told me that she didn’t get drunk thanks to a posting on my website (The secret is in the water) Dave! I wanted to tell you that I went out and I didn’t get drunk thanks to your website” I thought that she didn’t drink a lot after seeing a couple of my drunken posts. But no, instead she said that she read how if you drink a lot of water, how you won’t get drunk. She told me that she had 14 drinks last night, drank water after each drink and that other than a buzz, she was fine and that she doesn’t have a hangover this morning. A professional drunk is me! That’s a lot of water though. I told her that I don’t even do that. I told her that I let myself get drunk and that then at the end of the night, I start drinking water until I go to bed. She replied by saying that she had to be able to drive afterwards because none the girls she was with could drive. I don’t know, but I think she took a bunch of 5th graders out to bars.
Lids off!If you thought that the “Pasta Pot” was one of the dumbest inventions ever, here comes Lids Off. This is a machine for your kitchen, about the size of a juicer. You lift the upper half of the machine, insert a jar, lower the upper half, push a button and it opens the jar for you. An automatic jar opener. I have seen it all and I can die happy now.
Tattoo TabooI was trying to keep the whole tattoo thing kind of quiet at work. First of all, I figured it was none of their business to know. And second, I wasn’t sure if I was going to do it. Well, little by little the word started spreading (I’m sure that me blurting it out while drunk one night didn’t help) and now everyone knows. So the tattoo topic is not taboo anymore. And I guess that now it’ll be hard to back out. Mickey Mouse, here I come.
April fools follow upOn my April Fools entry I talked about how Andy and I ended up on a roof waiting for a plane (which obviously never came). Here’s a picture of us reading the sing that our coworkers were holding up for us all the way down on the street.
Exercising my rights in my underwearEven thought I’ve been in the US for many years, I’m still a citizen of Spain. A few weeks ago I received a letter from the Spanish Embassy in the US telling me of upcoming regional elections in Spain (similar to city and state elections here in the US) So I filled out some paperwork, included a copy of my Spanish passport and sent it all out. Yesterday I received a thick envelope with a bunch of instructions allowing me to vote in Spain through the mail. So this morning I got up, I read the instructions while doing my business in the bathroom, and then sat on my computer chair in my underwear and voted. Best way to vote ever. Everyone should try it someday.
Drinking waterWe actually had a pretty good night tonight. I’m kind of drunk again. I wasn’t planning on it but whatever. IT happens. Hehe, look I’m not even typing bvery well. Whatever. I do waht I want! I bet I;’ll be embarrasded tomorrow when I see this entry but it is all parrt o f the fun! I had half the drinks I had last time so I’m just badly buzzed but not realy drunk. Just a little. I want to gout - go out - and hve some more drinks and then come back home. But noooo, they all wanted to call it a night. Wahtever! they do what they want!
The secret is in the waterWe had quite a night last night. Two coworkers and I decided to go out for a few drinks after work, at 4:30 pm. After 3 bars, running two of them out of rum, several games of darts, lots of loud conversations and high fives, we made it home by 1:30 am. One coworker didn’t come to work until after lunch. The other one came in 20 minutes later. I arrived to my office 10 minutes early. A smart drunk is me. (the secret is this: drink lots of water at the end of the night and during the night)
Afraid of offendingToday I emailed back and forth with a student for 2 hrs. She kept telling me that she still had to take a test but that whenever she tried to access it, the system told her that she had already taken it. Well, there were links for 2 tests. One on top, one at the bottom. She kept telling me that she clicked on the link and she was told that she had already taken it. I spent 2 hrs this morning trying to explain that there were two links. Click on the other one. At the end of the 2 hrs, I sent her this almost insulting picture but it did the trick.
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