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Archive for May, 2007
The Simpsons go to EPCOTThis cracks me up every time.
I was boredI am 20% White Trash.
 I, my friend, have class. I am so not white trash. . I am more than likely Democrat, and my place is neat, and there is a good chance I may never drink wine from a box.
Use your mouth for goodHoly crap. This works. I thought it was not true and they were trying to get people to look stupid, so I waited until dark and I went outside. I walked far away from my car so that my remote wouldn’t work. It put it under my chin, pushed a button, and it worked! I did some more testing and I had a bit more luck putting it on the side of my jaw instead of under my chin, but the important thing is that it works. I always have a hard time finding my car at Disney, this will help!
Memory AideSuckerI’m a sucker for marketing. I’ll admit it. I was at the grocery store the other day and something caught my eye. It was a large black bag with some white writing. So I took a second look at it. Sure enough, all black bag and white text and logos. No other colors. It had the Doritos logo and in big letters it said “X-13D Flavor Experiment.” So being the sucker that I am, I just had to buy it. Apparently you are supposed to taste it and then go to a website and name the product. When I first tasted the chemical goodness, I thought it tasted like chipotle mayonnaise. But the bag says “Tasting notes: All-American classic.” And then it hit me, wait a second, this tastes like a cheeseburger! Dude! Cheeseburger Doritos! Delicious!
I cracked myself up out of sleepI had a weird dream last night. I dreamed that I was having dinner with Bush among others and I cracked a joke at his expense. The punchline was “I don’t know, but I doubt I’ll be meeting with the queen any time soon!” And next thing I know, I wake up just laughing and laughing.
Fashion updateJust in case you didn’t get the memo, today I read that yellow is the new pink. Does anyone know what the new black is?
DestinyI woke up today with water all over the guest bathroom. Oh the joys of being a home owner. I called work and told them that I’d be working from home today because of my plumbing emergency. I called a plumber and when I got off the phone I turned the TV on. A few minutes later I see breaking news. There had been a shooting in a gas station that I drive by on my way to work every morning, at the same time as I always drive by it. I would have probably been a witness of the event, if not more, should I had not had that problem with my bathroom. The plumber left recently. He could not find a single reason for that water. No leaks anywhere he could find, nothing. He tried to reproduce it best he could. No water anywhere. Weird, uh?
Haunted bathroomI think that our bathroom at work is haunted. I went in this morning and while I was opening the door, I heard some weird noises in there and the lights were flickering. Once I entered, the noises stopped immediately and the lights didn’t flicker. Who is haunting our bathroom?
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